Can we chat for a moment? I mean have a moment where both you and I are #honest and vulnerable? Our timelines are filled with all sorts of love, positive, rah-rah, yippee moments (which are all beautiful) but sometimes along our journeys there are moments where and when we do not feel the love, our rah-rah is more of a meh and if feels like there are more ‘boo’ moments than yay!
Sometimes you do not feel like searching for the silverlining or looking on the bright side.
Sometimes you want to yell, #kick, cry, scream, #curse and curl up in your bed in your pjs snotty face and all.
Sometimes you may feel as if it is taking an ENTIRE eternity to reach a specific goal, or as if love has forgotten you.
Sometimes you may have a plethora of "why and why not" questions for God and you rattle them all off through tears or while yelling.
Sometimes you may feel jealous, envious, sad, frustrated, angry, disappointed or any other range of emotions.
I know I have. Yes, me Ms. Love Grows has felt and experienced EACH of these along my journey and I KNOW I am not the only one. At Love Grows we encourage and support our clients to feel and allow their emotions to flow, ALL of their emotions, even the socially unacceptable ones listed above that do not fit into pretty turquoise boxes or 160 characters. Being emotionally mature means you understand, accept and allow yourself to FEEL, to feel everything that is going on inside of YOU. For when you do not, you end up stuffing and stuffing becomes blocks and blocks turn into emotional wounds.
The key is to allow these emotions to flow, without hurting yourself or anyone else. Yes, you may feel blah, but this does NOT allow you to harm another in any manner including emotionally, verbally or physically. At Love Grows we encourage our clients to set a timer, for example for 10 minutes and in those 10 minutes you fully go at it…yell, scream, curse, punch the pillow or bag, do whatever you need to move that energy through you. When the 10 minutes is up, take an assessment. How do you feel? Do you still have more? If so, set the timer again for another 10 minutes. Repeat.
Once you feel calm, set the timer to double the time it took you to vent and this time use the time to express your gratitude for absolutely everything you have, overcame, was protected from, lived through, learned, etc. Begin with your physical health and work your way out. The purpose of this activity is to chase all the blah you just released with gratitude and for gratitude to be the last thing you send out to the world.
Of course there are some experiences which are so painful a therapist is needed and this is also okay. Life is not always cotton candy sweet regardless of how positive and optimistic you are. But the beauty is the ‘dish’ of life is much more exciting when all of the ‘flavors’ (savory, salty, spicy, fruity, etc) are incorporated. Be gentle. Be patient. Be loving.